17 Mayıs 2010 Pazartesi
Ayşe'den Emma'ya Mektup
My Dearest Emma,
You have opened up to me many times in vague sings and gestures, but last night at supper you made me your confidant about your unfortunate situation. I am honored…. yet I am more so troubled by this, because I bear the weight of the truth on my shoulders knowing what some in the village is assuming.
In short, I’ve eyes and I’ve seen you , I’ve ears and I’ve listened to you, but my heart and soul can not make the best judgment for you. Because my best judgment would be your agony…You see, I am as fool as you!.. and for that I am not the best choice.
Remember yesterday I saw you sitting under a rosemary tree with your book on your hand all dazed and lost in it. I came to greet you but you just read to me....
Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - ..... Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.
This letter was found in Beethoven's desk after he died. This was not addressed to anybody, so it is impossible to know who he was writing to. Historians feel this was written to a married woman who he loved dearly, and who was leaving the city at the time of this letter.
Like you I believe!.. but give thy thoughts no tongue….. Yes I am a fool like you but open your heart and eyes before all else is ruined and always remember this…. My words fly up , my thoughts remain below, words without thoughts never to heaven go.
A glooming peace this morning with it brings,
The sun for sorrow will not show his read.
Go hence to have more talk of these sad things,
Some shall be pardoned, and some punished.
For never was the story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.
May your ending be never like this......
But Mark ME!.....
To thine own self be true!....
Your Friend Ayşe
P.S: Just to give you an idea of what my century is all about!...